your mom goes to college.

17Oct07

i got myself into more army wife drama somehow. basically i said something to this army girlfriend and it got misconstrued into something it wasn’t, then another wife told her husband what i said and he got upset and told another boyfriend of a friend of mine, who then went to rob about it. i’m seriously done with these girls. the one who i said the thing to seemed different but now i’m realizing that she’s no different. i shouldn’t have to censor everything i say…people who are my friends should be willing to tell me when i’ve stepped over a boundary, or take into consideration my sense of humor when i say something stupid. fuck it. i know who my true friends are and i need to focus on that.

i have done nothing these past few days. i’m going to pittsburgh on thursday and i thought i’d have so much done by now. but i just can’t get myself into my work…fuck, this is my vacation! i should be relaxing, dammit! oh well. i did finish my spanish diarios yesterday so that was a step forward. i still have to start my philosophy paper at some point, do my sociology assignment, russian readings/essays…i think i’ll have time to do those things in pittsburgh and when i get back on sunday afternoon. and tomorrow.

robbie left for a week so we won’t talk until this weekend. it made me really sad and i kind of went crazy for a sec on the phone about the army. i’m just so emotionally exhausted and i really don’t want to have to wait to talk to him or be with him. god i miss that boy. on the 18th it will be 4 months since i’ve seen him, which really isn’t that much but still. ready for this deployment to be fucking done with.

the army girlfriend i mentioned above told me yesterday that i talk too much about rob and she can’t get a word in edgewise about her boyfriend, and also that i make rob sound like he’s better than everyone. this goes back to not having to censor myself.

i’ve felt shitty all day and took 2 naps. something interesting about me: when i am feeling sad or depressed i usually sleep with the pillow over my head..kind of a “hiding” thing i think.

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